For Writers and Alert People: News from Nellie

I looked around online (different sites) and here are some predictions I found. I left out all the World War III / End of the World depressing stuff - who needs it?

1   Earthquake in California will damage the Hollywood sign

2   The Beckhams will announce their divorce, as will Katie & Tom Cruise

3   Google personal alerts will get more personalized

4   The new hot job will be “data scientist”

5   Cell phones will act like wallets (they already do in Europe and Japan!)

6   Birds or poultry will make us sick

7   A lost expedition to Antarctica will be discovered when an ice shelf breaks off

8   An earthquake or storm will reveal Atlantis

9   Vladimir Putin will be in an accident

10  Lindsay Lohan will not stop drinking

11  Larry King will die and be cryogenically frozen

12  Sandra Bullock and Katy Perry will get pregnant

13  Someone will announce their intention to run for president on Glenn Beck’s show

14  There will be violence in Washington, DC, as corruption is exposed

15  Companies will stop outsourcing their customer service to India

16  The city of Toronto will be overrun by bats

17  UFO sightings will increase and the government will begin to acknowledge them

18  Michael Jackson will turn up alive and do a comeback tour

19  Wall Street will be hit by a bombing

20  The world will become aware of some new technology that no one realized China possessed

The Year of the Rabbit will be about self-preservation, self-reliance, self-sufficiency, and creating a safe environment for you and your loved ones.

While you probably thought “trending topics” was just a curiosity, it actually represented Twitter’s first steps into data mining for commercial purposes.

Now data mining is coming to Twitter in a serious way. And Twitter is going to make a fortune off your tweets.

Corporations want access to your Twitter messages so they can learn more about who has what opinions where, and why. They are already following everything you do on Facebook and everything you research or purchase on your computer, so this is just another source of information for them - and another erosion of privacy for you.

Twitter reserves the right to sell 100% of its datastream to whomever it wants. In partnership with Gnip, Twitter also has announced three new ways for companies to access the Twitter stream:

• Twitter Halfhose - corporations can purchase 50% of the full firehose.
• Twitter Decahose - they can purchase 10% of the full firehose. 
• Twitter Mentionhose - they can purchase the realtime tweets that mention a user, including @replies and re-tweets. This means any corporation can buy access to your individual Twitter remarks.

The companies are supposed to use this information only for analysis, not for public display. However, they can use the information for “targeted tweeting” of their own. At the very least, I would expect companies to start following people who might use their products, and sending out Twitter advertisements (or hopefully discounts!).

What do you think of this development?

http://www.mediabistro.com/alltwitter/twitter-will-start-selling-half-of-all-tweets-for-360000year_b450

Where is Dick Cheney?

Here is a link to a fascinating video of Rachel Maddow explaining Cheney’s end-stage heart device that keeps him alive by essentially bypassing his heart and continually pumping his blood like a garden hose - so he has no heartbeat or pulse! After having this device implanted, people either get a heart transplant or keep living for a few years with a power source attached to their body at all times. During the day they can use a battery back; at night they must be plugged into the wall. The video dates from July 14, 2010 - there’s no telling what kind of shape Cheney is in today.

http://vodpod.com/watch/4026137-dick-cheney-has-no-pulse

This is NOT an urban legend. There are more photos at http://rmbuquoiphoto.photoshelter.com/

RT @shannynmoore

Why, oh, why does Sarah Palin ignore the laws of hibernation for mama grizzlies? Cave. Sleep. 6 months. Shhh. Perfect.

By now the ribbons and bows and gift tags and wrapping paper have been tidied away. You may even have taken down your Christmas tree, so your presents are no longer basking in its warm, twinkling lights. In the cold light of the post-Christmas day, how do you really feel about the items you received? Are there a few duds in your little pile?

Some of us don’t receive a great many gifts, but most everyone has had the experience of opening up a present that turned out to be disappointing, or even mystifying. After the frenzy of Christmas gift-giving ends, up to 30% of presents are packed up and returned to retailers. As you can imagine, this is a huge headache for the stores. Imagine if you thought your store had sold the last of those frosted glass pickle dishes, only to have them all boomerang back to your returns department two weeks later – for a refund.

According to the Washington Post (http://tinyurl.com/24l3oyx), Amazon.com is working on a process that could make everyone happy by simply short-circuiting the delivery of unwanted gifts. If Aunt Lydia simply does not know what to give you, you could steer her towards Amazon.com, where a list of your preferences would be available (no woolen sweaters, please!). The process might even allow for suggestions, the way a bride “registers” for wedding gifts.

If Aunt Lydia decides to send you a maroon sequin evening purse with a long strap for formal events (yes, this is one of the thoughtful gifts I received after the birth of my first child), you would receive an e-mail notification before the gift is sent. You will have the option of saying no, please do NOT send the maroon sequin evening purse, because I will only send it back. You may also have the option of picking something else you really want.

At this point, gift-giving etiquette becomes somewhat tricky. You could write Aunt Lydia and tell her that the maroon sequin purse has been exchanged for a baby blanket and the sippy cup your child really needed.  Or you could write a thank-you note to Aunt Lydia for the maroon sequin purse and, assuming she does not come over and ask to see it, she’ll be none the wiser. To some people, including me, this would fall under the category of “white lie” – an untruth that is told with the best of intentions to smooth over what would otherwise be an awkward situation.

This idea is not universally popular. Apparently Anna Post, the great-great-granddaughter of the late etiquette author Emily Post, who is now spokeswoman for the Emily Post Institute, is appalled. She believes that cutting off unwanted presents at the pass completely misses the spirit of gift-giving. She says, “Gift-giving is not just about the loot. It’s about the fact that someone thought to get you something, and took the time to do it.”

In the old days, Aunt Lydia would have had to venture forth from her apartment, brave the chaos at Macy’s, find an appropriate gift, have it wrapped, bring it home, wrap it for mailing, take it to the Post Office, and so on. It really did “take time” to give someone a gift, and we appreciated the effort that went into it, even if a maroon sequin purse was not something we wanted.

These days, with a few clicks of a computer, Aunt Lydia can send us ANYTHING from the comfort of her own home. I think today there is more emphasis on the “loot” because buying an appropriate, affordable gift for someone has become as easy as sitting up in bed.

Having received a number of wildly inappropriate gifts over the years, I do not see gift-giving with the same rose-colored glasses as Ms. Post. Some people are positively sadistic with their gifts, like sending Size 2 pajamas to their plus-size niece, or a box of candy to their son who is dieting, or a 12 Months of Puppies calendar to a family whose dog just died. If someone gave you the option of avoiding these experiences, wouldn’t you take it?

What is the worst gift you ever received? What do you think of Amazon’s proposed new system? Would you rather receive the maroon sequin evening purse, and thank Aunt Lydia for her thoughtfulness? Or would you take the option of turning it into that coffee grinder or pashmina you really want? Please let me hear from you in the comments below!

UPDATE: This web site should help you make up your mind:

http://www.whydidyoubuymethat.com

RT @Gawker

Eight-Year-Olds Publish Study in Respected Science Journal http://gawker.com/5715860

// A class of British schoolchildren did an original study about bees. With the help of a parent, they designed and executed an experiment that contributed new information to the ways in which bees differentiate “good” flowers from “bad” ones. Unlike traditional scientific articles, they did not cite any other work on the subject. But they wrote the whole article themselves, and apparently it is delightful. Good for them!

Thanks to http://weheartit.com/entry/4328401

74% of American adults are internet users

8% of online adults use Twitter  (men =  7%, women = 10%)

2% of online adults use Twitter so on a typical day

6% of women between the ages of 50 and 64 (that’s me)

Twitter is most popular with young adults, African-Americans and Latinos, and Urban dwellers. Not exactly the target audience for an old white lady.

http://pewinternet.org/Reports/2010/Twitter-Update-2010/Findings/Overview.aspx

RT @BorowitzReport

We may trail India and China in math and science, but we are second to none in Internet trolls. 

I’m not Mormon, and I’ll never be Mormon, so I don’t know much about the special magic Mormon Underwear. I was surprised to find this edifying picture. Romney has declined to say whether he wears the Mormon “garments” or not.

I apologize if this has offended any Mormons, but to me magic underwear makes as much sense as a tin foil hat.

For more on this story, see http://chasblogspot.blogspot.com/2007/02/is-mitt-romneys-underwear-sacred.html, or http://wonkette.com/217378/mitt-romneys-underwear-cover-up, 

As a reader, do you feel the need to know about the life of the writer whose book you are reading? Or is the book itself enough? 

I’m asking this question because sometimes it’s better not to know. Heaven knows there are plenty of famous painters who were dreadful human beings, and plenty of writers and poets who were addicted to opium or alcohol and not exactly pillars of their communities.

Sometimes a book is good, but the writer is bad. For example, Dickens - whose writing I adore - kicked his wife out onto the street 22 years of marriage and many children, the youngest of whom was just 6 when his mother was expelled. John Cheever was a bisexual alcoholic. Science fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard was not only a satanist, but also was such a raving lunatic he was being given injections of psychiatric tranquilizers when he died. Virginia Woolf was mentally ill, had affairs with women, and killed herself by placing heavy stones in her pockets walking into a river. Ernest Hemingway was an alcoholic womanizer who died by shooting himself in the head. Even Thoreau was something of a crank who depended on his friend Emerson to keep a roof over his head. And on and on.

These days publishers have commanded writers to get to know their readers - to set up blogs and Facebook pages and Twitter accounts for sharing their thoughts and the stories from their lives so readers will feel a personal connection with them that translates into book sales. This all seems utterly cynical to me, since the bottom line is making money.

What if we really don’t like the writer very much - say, James Frey, or Bret Easton Ellis? What if he or she is a terrible person, but writes a beautiful book? Do we really need to know so much about the individual? 

What if a writer is shy and uncomfortable with social media?  Should he or she be punished for not having a “publicity platform”?

If you are a reader or a writer, let me know how you feel about all this.

God bless Carnie Wilson. Sometimes she has her weight under control and sometimes she doesn’t. Here’s what she says:

“I’m fat as f**k, what can I say? You know, after all these years, it’s just like we are who we are and it’s a struggle for me and sometimes I’m heavier and sometimes I’m thinner.”

Tim’s message to gay, lesbian, bi, transgender, and questioning youth:

“Well, I’ll share with you. As a 17-year-old youth who was in quite a bit of despair, I attempted to kill myself. And I’m very happy today that attempt was unsuccessful, but at the time it was all I could contemplate. I thought, “I need to end things right now.” I’ll tell you, when I woke up the next morning after taking more than 100 pills, I was in a whole other level of despair. I thought, “I shouldn’t be here, this isn’t what was meant to be.” I frankly just wanted to start life all over again… I understand the desperation, I understand the despair, and I understand how isolated you can feel, and you have a lot of - I get very emotional - people really care about you, and I’m included in that group. So reach out, get help, IT WILL GET BETTER, I promise.

“

RT @BetsyLerner  http://www.betsylerner.com  

Did you hear the one about the man whose agent killed his family and burned down his house? The guy comes home to discover that his wife and children have been raped and murdered, and his house has been burned down. The cop explains that his agent had come to his house.

“Really?” the guy says, all excited. “My agent came to my house?” 

Betsy hosted  special Holiday comments section for griping about agents. While some commenters had nothing but nice things to say, the rest had stories that will make your hair stand on end. If you are seeking an agent, you should probably read them.

As it says in the comments, you either get Betsy or you don’t.

RT @irenelevine

My Son Was Diagnosed With Bipolar Disorder: http://yhoo.it/hRQ1Oi

// Excellent article If you havre ANY doubts about the possibility of children being bipolar, read this article and the comments.

The crudely built, unpainted, imitation “pirate vessel” RawFaith departed Salem for Bermuda yesterday, but didn’t get far. About 100 miles off Nantucket, the ship started taking on water in 10 foot seas. After the bilge pump broke, the ship took on two feet of water and became very unstable. The boat was built without an engine, and at that point was unable to move under her own power. The vessel also had no heat, only one survival suit, and only a hand-held radio for emergencies. The temperature in the North Atlantic ocean was in the low 50s F.

The Coast Guard launched two Falcon jet sorties to assess the situation, plus it sent a C-130 plane, plus it made 4 helicopter sorties. The Coast Guard also sent cutters Tybee and Reliance to monitor the vessel. Eventually a Coast Guard helicopter was able to pass additional survival gear to the two men on board. A Coast Guard water rescue specialist dove into the rough seas and helped the 2 men into the rescue basket hanging from a helicopter. The captain tried to bring a 4 foot piece of wood with him, but was unable to get into the basket with it.

The RawFaith has been rescued by the Coast Guard before - both times when it ventured out to sea. In 2004 it became disabled and was towed by the Coast Guard back to Rockland, Maine. In 2006, all three of its masts - which were too small for the size of the boat - fell down. The Coast Guard rescued it again and ordered it to remain docked in Maine until it made repairs. In 2009, the was ship docked in Maine again for further repairs. In the summer of 2010, somehow the ship made it as far as Massachusetts.

The Coast Guard has long had concerns about the seaworthiness of the ship, which was not built to meet federal standards for passenger safety. A Maine sailor, Jeff Totman, noted on a web site that the owner of the boat, George McKay, has no sailing or boatbuilding expertise. “He just built himself a boat and headed out to sea. And every time he does, he has to be rescued.”

McKay, who has a disabled daughter, sold his house and put all his family’s savings into the primitive boat, which he started building in 1999. At first he hoped to use the ship to help disabled people experience the sea, and he secured grants and donations for this reason. However, the boat was never approved for this purpose, and eventually became more of a tourist attraction like Pirates of the Caribbean.

Blogger Charles Doane notes, “I wasn’t very surprised—indeed, I was almost relieved—when I learned that RawFaith sank on Wednesday about 160 miles southeast of Cape Cod. It was a long anticipated tragedy, realized at last.”

Here’s a video that shows what passed for sailing knowledge aboard the RawFaith.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EAy3rcgkbbQ

RT @victoriastrauss 

The 13 most obnoxious publishing stories of 2010  http://tinyurl.com/2fxdrke 

//For anyone still wondering if publishing is nuts

13.  Grand Central Publishing awarded comedian Chelsea Handler her own book imprint. The second book to be released under her new imprint will reportedly be penned by her dog, Chunk. 

12.  Literary agent Andrew Wylie launched his own publishing imprint in June, a partnership with Amazon to publish exclusive eBook editions of dozens of classic books. When Random House (and nearly the rest of the publishing world) disputed his authority to publish the books, he relented.

11.  Breakout Jersey Shore star The Situation dropped a book in November, his “Guide to Creeping on Chicks.” 

10.  Hilary Duff’s YA series. Duff compared writing to wedding planning: “I was planning [my] wedding, and there’s deadlines with that, too… I couldn’t even choose which one is harder. I guess I’d say the book.”  Other celebrities “writing” novels in 2010 included Lauren Conrad and Nicole Richie. 

9.  Two New York Times reviews and a TIME cover story for Jonathan Franzen’s latest book got some female authors least tweeting. Using the hashtag “Franzenfreude,” Jennifer Weiner and Jodi Picoult engaged the Twitterverse in an ongoing conversation on women’s place in the literary world. 

8.   Do we really want to rehash the Cooks Source train-wreck? The editor insisted everything online is for public use - without acknowledgment. The magazine is now history.

7.   Google Books. the eBook store that landed with a thud in December. Its impact on the publishing world is still up in the air.

6.   TWO books by Sarah Palin. “Sarah Palin’s Going Rogue (out in paperback in 2010), and the former Alaska governor’s second book, America by Heart, featuring no fewer than three American flags on the cover, was released in November. 

5.   James Frey’s re-entry into the literary world. Frey’s company, Full Fathom Five, has hired 30 or so struggling novelists for $500 apiece in an attempt to create “the next Twilight.” The contracts, according to New York Magazine, are “brutal.” 

4.   Borders contemplatied a bid for Barnes & Noble. Rogue investors also made a play for Barnes & Noble (and failed). Which chain bookstore will be the last one standing in the US?

3.   16-year-old Justin Bieber’s illustrated memoir was released in October and gobbled up by his fanbase and ignored by critics. To promote his book, he even began wearing thick-rimmed glasses. 

2.  Jonathan Franzen was impossible to ignore in 2010, from his TIME cover story to reports of his trademark glasses being stolen off his face at a London book party. Oh, and there was Oprah, too. You remember what he said the first time she invited him.

1.  Time to slit your veins. MTV’s Jersey Shore star Snooki got a book deal with Simon and Schuster for a novel, A Shore Thing. The pint-sized TV star admitted to reading only two books—in her entire life (Twilight and Toxic Men - or so she says, anyway).